Anonymous asked:

My dad says Amtrak is a crack-shack full of hippies and communists, but it turns out I’m transsexual and a communist so I think I’m switching teams, also I would like to try crack if you really do have it

amtrak-official answered:

Your dad actually just gave me an amazing idea, I need to start selling coke on the train. But yeah welcome to the public transit lovers club

[penn-central-official]

You already sell coke

[amtrak-official]

I mean the good sort of coke

Oh, you mean Pepsi?

[wendys-unofficial]

YOU DID NOT JUST SAY THAT

Wait, I mistyped.

I meant DIET Pepsi

[wendys-unofficial]

If talking types of coke, Dr. Pepper is superior

Nah, Diet Dr. Pepper x Cream Soda wins

[amtrak-official]

I was referring to cocaine for Christ's sake, now get all of you corperate fucks, get the fucking hell off my train

It's rather nice here, actually. @official-wendells, what do you think?

[official-wendells]

but I like public transport

Me too. @amtrak-offical, I think we'll be extending our overnight car stay.

[amtrak-official]

I have a better idea...

😢

@culvers-unofficial Culvie, Amtrak is being mean to me

[culvers-unofficial]

NO ONE IS MEAN TO MY SIBLING >:((

[wendys-unofficial]

FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT-

[olive-garden-official]

Kill! To the Death!

[amtrak-official]

Get off my goddamn train or lord so help me, I going to personally end each and everyone of you monopolistic corperate leeches on society

[wendys-unofficial]

Fuckin' try it, this is why I have The Creature™

And The Goop™ is on my side

[amtrak-official]

Neither Trademarks nor Mortality cause any fears