My favorite this about taking the train is how openly the workers hate my guts and think I am an empty-headed pack animal who needs help knowing the difference between cities on a map.

I am being completely serious. I am a scared baby in a very large noisy world and having serious broads and mean gays in blue uniforms tell me where to go like it should have been obvious is such a relief. Ppl with good customer service want me to like them, bossy ppl want me to go the fuck home and get off their train and that's the energy I instinctively trust.