We should release 5 Bisexual messes onto an empty train apart from the crew and see what would happen
We would make it seem as though the all the passengers but them vanished by leaving tons of luggage and things in the coach despite only 5 people riding it
Among the things "left" on the train would be a gun, a book of incantations and an Alanis Morrisette CD
is the gun loaded?
The bullets are hidden in other parts of the Coach
Also all of Bisexuals kinda hate each other over petty 5 year old drama
I’m the queer sitting three carriages down who they all assume must have something to do with SOMETHING, but no, I’m actually just the old-fashioned comic relief who got overly-engrossed in my book.
(Picturing this entirely on an Amtrak long-distance train. For some reason, my brain keeps imagining it on the west-bound Zephyr or the east-bound Builder?)
If it wouldn't ruin the effect, I'd love to volunteer to be the random queer ace passenger in a completely different coach car who keeps randomly popping up just doing normal passenger stuff.
Sitting at one of the lounge car tables, snacking on chips and playing some weird solitare variant (with Amtrak playing cards, of course).
Two of the bisexuals rush past while I'm chatting with the car attendant about nothing in particular.
I'm passing through one of the empty coaches while some big, dramatic moment is happening, and yeah, the vibes are weird, but, uh, I'm just going to keep going and get to the diner car to have breakfast, thanks.
Okay we can have 2 more passengers because both of you seem like you would enhance the storyline


